Cleaning out my Closet

A couple of nights ago I began the daunting task of cleaning out my closet at home. How it is possible for me to live in a different town 90% of the year and still have a full closet at home-- is completely beyond me. But I came to the realization that when I graduate and move home... I may need a place to put my stuff... funny how that works.

Anyway, so I began this task... at 10:30 at night... because that makes sense right? Stirred up a lot of dust, sneezed about 25 times, and basically made a big mess of my room until about 1:30 in the morning... How much progress did I make? Well... Here is what my room looks like two days later...

Oops...

But I've got to be honest... I had so much fun going through this mess. I found so many pictures, art projects, journals, books... I have so many memories crammed into that closet, that it is hard for me be frustrated with the "situation" I have in my room now.

I got a lot of laughs, a lot of "Wow-I was a weird kid" thoughts, along with, "Wow-so much has happened" and "I have grown up so much."

But the coolest thing that I found was in an old notebook that I had taken to camp one year. I guess I wrote in it during our devotional times at night (well I did for the first two nights anyways...there is a big gap in between dates, typical) but towards the end of the two weeks I have this quote, written below, in this notebook... at the end of the quote I wrote "well, I stayed up and copied this down via flashlight because it really meant something to me tonight... I have never heard something so honest and true, regarding this subject... I hope I don't lose it and read it in the future some day." (I didn't lose it...)

“Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone;

to have a deep soul relationship with another;

to be loved thoroughly and exclusively.

But God says,“No, not until you satisfied, fulfilled, and content with being loved by Me alone, and with having intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone, discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found; only then will you be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you.

You will never be united with another until you are united with Me.

Exclusive of anyone else, exclusive of any other desires or longings, I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing, one that you cannot imagine.

I want you to have the best.

Please allow me to bring it to you.

You just wait. That’s all.

Don’t be anxious. Don’t worry.

Don’t look around at the things others have gotten or that I’ve given them.

Don’t look at the things you think you want.

Just keep looking off and away up to Me or you’ll miss what I want to show you.

And then, when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than you could dream of.

You see, until you are ready (I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time), until both of you are satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I have planned for you, you won’t be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me; and this perfect love.

And, dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love; I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting love that I offer you with Myself.

Know that I love you utterly. I am God. Believe and be satisfied.”

-unknown

Some of you may have read this at some point, may have heard it at camp too for all I know... But I just couldn't help but be a little amused that I copied it down when I was a freshman in high school... only to find it now... going into my last semester of college.

The poem, or quote, or whatever you want to call it, means more to me now, in a way, and in a totally different way than it did 7 years ago... funny how the same words do that, isn't it?

So I decided to copy it again, here, so that maybe we could all find a little encouragement from it... because it is true, God loves us and needs us to be patient, so that the most thrilling plan, and love, can come into our lives and bless us more than we could ever imagine.

My number one New Year's resolution: Do a better job of running like crazy after my sweet sweet Jesus

Number two: Dealing with the "situation" on my floor--ugh.

xo

Katie